I hate you. stay away from me

later this afternoon, after a long long long weeks, i saw him. the guy who's having the half of my heart. (aw.) as i walked on the corridor of our building floor(3rd). i saw him standing at the wall. i don't know how to greet him. actually, he's with his friends, or i guess blockmates. you know that awkward feeling, that after what happens, actually nothing really intimate happens, it's just that, he was actually a big part of my college life. (im not exaggerating here.).. i deeply known him since january(current year,) it all started with a text message and afterwards the typical "asaran" shared by friends, i was very comfortable when im with him, it feels like i've known him for so long..

i think. we really can talk about anything (under the sun). we stayed up soo late talking about anime. all of it. there's this time that i was very tired and sleepy in class because of him and he was like. duh. 'he's absent,' (very funny though). Honestly at first, i really don't like him. hmm. okay! no doubt, i like his eyes, his the typical 'chinito' which, is listed in my standards(yes, me and my b2 have guy standards,).. yes, and all of a sudden.. poof. a like him a lot. and i don't really know why.. okay. maybe i know why. i just can't admit it to myself that i am really falling for him. the guy who's been so annoying that really push you to kill people on your way. the guy who's really retarted and bastard.. hobbies is playing online games and consistent late in class. the guy who really doesn't know his future. the guy who's i don't know.

and then now. after knowing him that much, after knowing him deeply. and yes, i really fell in love with him and took me about 7 months to forget about him. and honestly, i don't know where will i start. it feels like the first time i saw him and know his name. it feels like that. they're all asking me.." why don't you greet each other?" yes, they're all asking me. not HIM.

i really miss him. really. everytime i saw him, i feel like. crying. okay. im not exagge. it's just that. he's with her now. the girl who's always our topic. the girl his eyeing. but i'm happy for him. atleast. he'll worry his life now. (laugh, it's a joke.)

Please.. Stay away from me. I hate you. i hate you..

i hate you so much that leads me to love you even more.

IHATEYOU-STAYAWAYFROMME

renafterhours: i hate you. stay away from me. : 15th post